Conversations with certain people

Conversations with certain people have this extraordinary way of opening a portal in my mind. I’m flooded with ideas after we talk, long-standing problems I’ve had miraculously resolve even though we didn’t talk about the problems at all. It’s like the mind-melding catalyzes some kind of transformation and, presumably, in the mind of the other. Nix calls this parallel metamorphosis:

Parallel metamorphosis occurs where there is shared investment in the movement of another’s mind. We co-create personal artifacts. A pool of shared references: books, hosted events, ideas, grinning faces on my camera roll. I save the links you send because I admire your taste. I read your words because it’s like hanging out in your brain for a little bit. Does love demand intellectual companionship from us? I certainly think so.

Sometimes this transformation is only one-way. I’ve been on both ends—the one whose mind was transformed, and the one whose mind wasn’t. As transformee, there’s been times where I’d walk away feeling a little insecure and guilty: I’ve gained so much from this interaction, but I wasn’t able to give anything back. In most cases, it was me overthinking and not being comfortable with only receiving. In other cases, the other person simply didn’t want to be as cooperative, or maybe they knew there wasn’t much to gain. I know this because there’s been times where I didn’t feel like being cooperative.

I increasingly believe that the most fruitful way to interact with people is to be open to such mutual mind-melding and metamorphosis.